Monday, January 17, 2011
Something to think about
I read this article this morning....and just couldn't make it through all 300+ comments. It wasn't so much the article, it was all the comments afterwards. I can't believe how many stereotypes there are about Mormon moms. It made me think, about myself, my religion, my blogging. I hope I don't try to make my life look all perfect. My kids don't look like little gap kids, my house is messy more often than clean, and I know plenty of non-mormon mommies who blog and are truly happy and crafty and just awesome Mothers!! I don't blog for reasons to make money or show off. I blog because it is an easy and fun way to make a record of my family life. My life. This is me. It is true that I stay at home and I had 5 kids by the time I was 30, but I live my religion to the fullest. And I don't need a blog to show the world that I am "happy" because I really am!! I am in love with Kirk more than ever even after 14 years of marriage. That isn't something you can fake. I would NEVER want anyone to think my life is too good to be true. But it is good, and I like to look at the positive side of my life. Please be real when you blog. That is why I like to read the blogs I do, because they are real. They share the good days and the bad days. You don't have to look all perfect to everyone else, and for the record I don't think the blogs she referred to do that. They just share their lives. I read several of them, and I have not felt like it was too good to be true. They seem pretty normal to me, maybe because I understand the "mormon culture" I am totally rambling on here, too many thoughts going through my head. I'd love to know what you think, Beth
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
Lots to think about. My sister in law refuses to write anything on facebook that is negative. She wants only the most positive things to show up there. I'm the type who will put up whatever I feel like writing. I'm naturally a positive kind of person, but if I'm having a rough day, that's what you see. (Remember my posts about my crushed foot.) Anyway, I'm with you, Beth. My kids aren't fashion plates for the Gap, and aren't perfect. I'm not perfect. Our house isn't perfect. But I'm content, and I wonder if that's really what draws these women to read Mormon mom blogs. They see a peace they don't see anywhere else.
I had a lot of the same thoughts, Beth; I don't think that, for example, NieNie makes life look eternally blissful and easy. She, like you, is REAL. It might just be that yes, there's chaos, but under the chaos is a real person who's at real peace with at least part of life.
We see what we look for, too. The author knows what to expect from Mormon women, (she thinks), and her expectations will inform how she perceives those women.
Along with the-grass-is-greener perceptions, which are universal to humanity, it might be as simple as the zoo thing - "hey, look at how these totally alien people live," LOL. Not in a horrid, condescending way, most of the time, but because they're so curious about LDS people in general. Blogs provide a window that a lot of people don't get otherwise. (And conversely, her article provides a window into non-LDS perceptions of the LDS world, that we don't get to see all the time, too.)
Anyway, that's my $.02 on it... :) Hope it's not bugging you too much.
Also, you should totally check out Mormon Mommy Wars. So should the article's author, LOL. I love it. :)
I read the article and read some of the comments. Personally I don't think the blogs that the author mentioned depict an all perfect life. The reason I like reading them because in their blogs are a message of hope.
That's funny that the mormon blogging culture in general would depict the perfect family, husband, home. I know for me that is not the case. I know I've always been honest in my blogging. Sure, it's human nature to want to focus on the positive. You want people to share in that happiness with you and be validated in it and you don't want people to feel sorry for you if you have hard days. It's kind of goes back to...you want to surround yourself with positive people that have a positive outlook on life. How draining would it be to have someone negative 100% of the time around you...or blogging negatively 100% of the time. That doesn't mean that you can't share it and by all means people should feel that they can and not be judged by it. There is a balance in all things! We are all here together to lift each other on a higher level. Through good and bad experiences.
You know better than anyone that for the first years of being a mommy I struggled. But I know there were people around me both mormon and not that loved being a mother and embraced that choice in their life and that was something I wanted to attain and work on. What better way then to listen and read of other people's experiences both successful and not so successful.
My suggestion to the hateful blog bashers is get to know the people of the families they think are so perfect. They have lives that have trials, happiness, sadness, joys, pain just like everyone else. Maybe their outlook will change.
As for me the reason I do the cooking and the crafting and everything because I ENJOY IT!!! It brings me HAPPINESS!!! AND I want to pass this on to my daughters. It gives me so much satisfaction to do those things. I don't show off everything that I do. Also, my family lives 1500 miles away and they would have no idea what went on in my life if I didnt write because I'm not that great at keeping in contact by phone.
And I'm rambling and not understanding what I'm writing! Keep on doing what your doing girlfriend!!!
Don't know if you listened to this or not but it was pretty cool. It's an interview with Stephanie and Christian.
http://broadcast.lds.org/ldsradio/Conversations/2011-01-0260-stephanie-nielson-64k-eng.mp3
Post a Comment